"Crazy Drunken Family" - 02/12/2008

"Crazy Drunken Family"
02/12/2008

I was hanging out with some wild, hillbilly family. We were in a backwoods kinda town, at night, and were getting completely hammered. This family had some sort of fixation with doing really dangerous shit, while drunk, and so while I was still having fun with them, I was slightly keeping my distance. Drinking what looked like Jack Daniels out of the bottle, one guy pulled out a pistol and started carelessly shooting at the propane tank beneath his BBQ grill. The bullets kept sparking off of the cylinder but wouldn’t explode. Rowdy as ever, another family member got on top of their pick up struck and started dumping gasoline all over it, yelling “WOOOOOOOOOO!!!” like the drunken lunatic he was. After he got down from atop the vehicle, one of the women, just as drunk, got inside of the car that was parked a few feet behind the pick-up. She floored it and drove straight into the back of the pick-up. The whole thing just exploded as if a bomb had gone off, rocking the entire yard and making a huge fireball. I thought that there was no way in hell that the woman could have lived through that, but the car door opened and she staggered out, laughing hysterically. 

Later, we were sitting on their porch, continuing to drink, and they were still doing crazy things like breaking glass, just to step on it with their bare feet, and playing around with knives. They also had a one-eyed cat walking around, and I couldn’t help but wonder if it had lost its other eye due to this kind of behavior. A young guy and girl decided that they were going to go out for a joyride, completely wasted, and they soon took off. After a while, I’d simply gotten tired of dealing with these people, because they were a little (a lot) too wild for me. I figured some or all of them were going to get killed, and there was no way I was about to sit there and preach to them. (They’d have probably killed me, anyway. Lol.) 

Apparently, these were my mom’s friends, more than they were mine. I was going to let her know what kind of stuff these psychos were up to, but she was fast asleep in one of the back rooms. I decided to do the same and went to another room to lie down for a while. Shortly afterward, the sun was beginning to come up. The lady of the house and one of her daughters came in and they seemed to have sobered up. I don’t remember whether or not I’d actually been asleep, but I got up and went to the kitchen to talk to them. The mother seemed to be somewhat embarrassed about the way they’d been acting and asked me not to judge them, which I told her I wouldn’t have. She started asking me questions about my past and my “relationship with white people.” Apparently they hadn’t had very many close interactions with black people before. She started asking about my mom’s as well. I gave her a brief run-down and told her that we treat white people just like we treat anyone else, that many of our closest friends were white, and that my daughter was half-white. This seemed to put her a little more at ease, and she just nodded her head. Then, without warning, she swiped up a box-cutter from the kitchen counter and held it up to her own throat, getting this crazed look in her eyes. She started manically asking me “So what would you do, if I were to just slit my throat, right now?! Would you even care??! Would you?!!” 

I’m like “What the fuck?? How could you even ask me that, after everything I just told you??” Her daughter was freaking out, telling her mom to stop, but the woman kept staring at me, shouting “Answer the question!! Answer it!!” with the box-cutter pressed up against her throat. 

That’s when I woke up.